What many people don't know is that the Bike has been my psychological nemesis ever since I was gifted with a scooter from my parents, when I was three years old. I got the scooter, my sister got the Bike. My sister mastered the Bike, while there was really nothing to master with the scooter; you just mosied along with a nice easy push of your other foot.
At the time I considered that my parents made the sensible choice in choosing the scooter over the Bike. I was, after all, notoriously uncoordinated, constantly falling over and forever getting splinters and bindies stuck in my knees. The scooter was a safe selection which was comparable to the Bike in that it had the same wheels, handle bars and bell-- just without the instability.
So, I contented myself with my scooter and considered that a scooter was still pretty special, given that no one else in kindy knew what one was.
I'll be honest though, at the back of my mind, there was always that annoying niggling thought: What was so hard about riding a bike that I couldn't have one of my own?
Eventually I comforted myself with the fact that once primary school was done and dusted, I wouldn't even really need to know how to ride a bike. Everyone seemed to forget about their bikes when there were Nintendos to play and gym routines to choreograph. In fact, I went through primary school and high school happily oblivious to the practical benefits of knowing how to ride a bike.
It wasn't until I was 23 (that's right, 23) that the need to know how to ride a bike dawned on me. I was leaving for Canada in two weeks' time, the fitness nation of the World and one of my friends asked me how I'd be getting around campus and the city:
"I'm just gonna walk! It's such a little city!" I stated. Blase as you could get.
For your information, both Montreal and Ottawa are pretty little, but that doesn't mean you don't need something faster than walking, to get around in a semi-efficient way.
"Nah, don't walk, hire a bike! They're cheap and they have special lanes in Canada devoted to bikes," my wise friend advised.
I recoiled in the realisation that my worldly friend was indeed correct. Canada was Bike City! Rollerblade City! Awesome Landscape City! I needed to learn how to ride a bike! Pronto.
As with most things I never got myself organised enough to learn how to ride a bike before I left. So, in week 2, one of my mates from high school (who by pure coincidence was visiting Montreal) roped me into hiring a bike, convincing me that I'd "pick it up in a heart beat. It's so easy".
To cut a long story short, 3 hours later, I was able to pedal on my own.
With the help of Kind Assistant # 1 who held onto the bike while I got on.
With the help of Kind Assistant #2 who helpfully pushed me off to get me enough momentum to get my arse into gear.
With the help of Kind Assistant #3 who ran beside me for the first 20 metres to make sure that I wouldn't just end up flat on the side like the ten billion previous attempts had ended.
I won't mention how many random members of the public shouted their encouragement as I stacked it attempt after attempt after attempt.
Eventually, I gave up when my jeans ripped at the crotch and I was in dire need of a luxury bike seat.
Since that time in 2007, I didn't dare touch another bike. Until last weekend that is.
Last weekend I mastered the Push-Off. During the week, I got the best advice from my work mate:
"Just keep your arms locked straight and your head up, and pedal really fast".
What wise words indeed.
As I mulled over her advice, waiting for the weekend to come before I could visit Man from Mars and take a turn on my Pink Bike with the Hot Flames down the Side, I envisaged myself doing it perfectly.
My first attempt was a failure as expected.
My second attempt was a little improved.
"It's okay, it's okay, I get it now" I insisted, and Man from Mars took a step back.
Fast push off, arms locked, head up and like magic, I cruised down the drive way for all of 50 metres before getting fearful and falling off.
I grinned, Man from Mars looked a little awestruck (okay, I made that bit up), and I got back up to gimme some more of that bike riding feeling.
Done and done. Bike Nemesis was officially conquered.
So that's why my weekend was so very productive. I learnt to ride my bike. Not only that but Man from Mars and I saw Avenue Q which was so funny, so real and so relevant to my life right now- it's probably one of the best theatre productions I've seen.
It was a stupendous weekend. Maybe even tremendous. And next weekend I'm going to do some more of that riding to make up for decades of lost bike riding time.
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