25 September 2011- Sydney

We woke up this morning at 9 am after a really broken sleep. I remember that at 3 am we both lay in the dark, talking in giant circles, lazily contemplating the post holiday slump. Our conversation went something like this:

Me: The trip feels like it was just an awesome dream

Man from Mars: Yer I know

Me: I don’t wanna go to work on Monday

Man from Mars: Same.

[Repeat, and add "really really really" before "don't wanna go to work on Monday"]

[Repeat again with a super whingy strine.]

[Repeat again.]

And then I apparently fell asleep.

We headed off back to the airport at about 11 am and I caught flight back to Sydney at 12 pm. I was bone tired and my head felt so muffled, but both my sister and mum were yapping at my suitcase to see what souvenirs I got them-- and so, we unpacked my bag and distributed goodies all around.

Afterwards, I fell asleep at 5:30 pm, and woke up at 7:30 pm. Although I wasn't all that hungry, I sort of felt obliged to eat and went and had an apple, orange and a cup of peppermint tea. It wasn't the smartest choice of food and the tea proved to be my downfall, sloshing around in my belly. I kid you not, I had to pee about 10 times throughout the night. I lay awake miserable and desperately wanting to sleep for the next eight hours before finally falling asleep at 3:30 am.

24 September 2011- Melbourne

6:30 am- Back in Melbourne- Customs takes ages and we get out at 7:45 am. It’s freezing cold (12 degrees).

My first thought when we hit the road to Man from Mars' house: Australia has lots of gum trees, space and the wide open air is so refreshing. The sky also looks heaps higher and ten times more blue. We’re exhausted and I’m damn straight glad to be home. Can’t deny that Australia rocks. But at the same time, what a fabulous adventure it’s been.

At one point, Man from Mars gets up from in front of the television (where we park ourselves for the better part of the day). He announces that he’s going to cut up some oranges, do I want some? For shizz, I confirm, and he shuffles off to get them.

He’s so tired that he mistakes pink grapefruit for orange. As he slumps back, he mumbles all worriedly: I thought it was an orange, but it was a grapefruit. I don’t believe him and think he’s just having another blonde culinary moment, but for once he’s absolutely right- the grapefruit really does look like an orange.

[Such deceptive orange looking peel:]

[And you flip it over and.... it's a grapefruit!]

We eat our grapefruit and oranges, watch some more tv before going to bed.

One final flight to Sydney tomorrow and then it’s really home time.

23 September 2011- On the plane

Get to the airport with the help of Kenny, the Terrific Taxi Driver again. Three hours later, we're on the plane to Australia. Watched Hanna. Slept 15 minutes.

[The novelty of getting a comprehensive meal served on a 40 cm x 30 cm tray:]

[Coming into Melbourne- the very start of a sunrise:]

22 September 2011- Seoul, Korea

This morning I woke up with a funky belly, which I suspect, had something to do with the 8 hour time difference. Waking up at 9:30 am meant that it was 1:30 am Swiss time— and my body was royally annoyed. It should’ve been asleep, not waking up for breakfast with the Korean sun starting to beat down! Also, I think I was a little bit nervy at the prospect of having to speak proper Korean to aunties and uncles who speak zero English, are staunchly conservative and who I’ve only met twice.

We had a mini breakfast on the hotel patio (stay at the Sunbee Hotel if you’re ever in Korea!) before we navigated our way to the Lotte Beckgajym which is Korea’s biggest and best department store. I asked the hotel reception for a map to get to Lotte Beckgajym (they didn’t understand what I was asking the first time so I had to repeat it in what I thought was a really exaggerated Korean accent but surprise surprise, it worked awesome with them!) before hailing a taxi and winding our way through the hectic traffic to the Beckgajym.

While we were in the taxi, my dad’s eldest brother called me on my mobile and shouted a couple of phrases about where he was in this enormous department store and how I should find him. The only words I caught were “on the first floor” and “behind”. Rightio.

We walked into one of four entrances and I hoped hoped hoped I would just be able to spot him. Wishful thinking. When I tried to call him, I realised that I’d left the piece of paper with his (and my other aunties’) phone numbers in the hotel, so all we could do was wait for him to call me. He did, and when I answered, out came a stream of mumble jumble that made my brain cramp. So, I bounded over to a nice looking lady manning the Gucci store and requested in my Australian accented Korean:

“I’m from Australia and my uncle is meeting me here, but I don’t know how to say “I’m in front of Gucci—could you talk to him?”

She was so nice- she laughed with her smiley eyes and took my phone before clearly and helpfully telling my uncle that we were right there in front of Gucci. Hallellujah. Two minutes later, my uncle’s son found us and led us to my uncle who had come from Gongdor, a country town that’s two hours away from the Beckgajym.

He looked so much older and littler than when I last saw him six years ago and although he’s generally the silent, brooding type, he gave a giant smile when he saw Man from Mars and I and then seated us down at Dunkin Donuts for an iced coffee (I don’t drink coffee, but I didn’t even care). We talked for a while, me dipping into my Korean phrasebook and him asking me to repeat everything I said because a) my korean didn’t make too much sense and b) he’s becoming a little bit hard of hearing, and we had a lovely chat before my dad’s two adorable big sisters arrived.

There they were, the Tour de Force- the two sisters who are the backbone of my dad’s family-- all curly topped hair, big smiles, and coming towards us with excited shouts of: “You’re here! Oh you’re here! Aww who could believe you’re here!” It was so great.

We talked some, we ate lunch, we shopped a bit and despite the language issues (“Learn KOREAN!!!! shouted my aunties on at least five occasions), we clicked. After all, family and lineage goes so much deeper than speaking the same language. I was so sad to say goodbye and so glad to have seen them; even if it was only for a handful of hours.

Afterwards, we walked back to the Sunbee and had a little rest before we met up with my mum’s brother and his wife and daughter. My mum’s brother is a top researcher at one of Korea’s best make-up companies, and when he fronted up with SEVEN KILOS of make up (Koreans are generous and will give you everything they have—so it won’t be one apple, it’ll be fifty. Likewise, he couldn’t stop at one lipstick and one bottle of face cream, he could only make do with SEVEN KILOS of various stuff), Man from Mars’ and my reactions couldn’t have been more different:

Man from Mars (concerned to the point of grim silence): We’re already over our weight limit

Me (so happy): So much make up—Wheeeeeeeeee!

We dropped the goodies off at our hotel before enjoying a delicious banquet at an authentic Korean restaurant—low tables and floor sitting and all. It was such a quick catch- up; just a two hour dinner, but it was so much fun and again, I was so so glad that I’d gotten to meet up with them.

That night, Man from Mars spent five hours until 2:30 am, packing and repacking our bags. He somehow manipulated our 47kg worth of luggage (our limit was 40kg) so that we were just within the weight limit. What a clever cookie.

Tomorrow, we leave for the airport at 2 pm and we will fly to Australia at 6:30 pm. So sad, the end’s come so quickly and I don't wanna go to work on Monday!!

20-21 September 2011- Lucerne/Seoul

Not much to report over these two days. We spent our last day in Lucerne visiting the Lion of Lucerne, mooching around the foreshore, before catching the train to Zurich Flughafen.

[Lion of Lucerne:]

[Pretty as a picture:]

[Who knew swans had such extendable necks. Go go gadget go!!:]

[Lake Lucerne:]

Ten hours later, after sitting in front of four adorable and remarkably well behaved Korean boys under the age of ten, we arrived in Seoul. In our brains, it was 9:30 am. Korean time, it was 3:30 pm. We got to our hotel with the help of our fabulous English speaking taxi driver, Kenny. Then I talked in horrible, stilted Korean to my aunties over the phone and maybe (I think) we managed to establish that we may meet up tomorrow. I’m not entirely sure because they hung up in a hurry and wanted to talk to my dad (who’s Korean is ten thousand percent more comprehensible than mine).

We had Korean barbecue for dinner before passing out at the respectable time of 11pm.

19 September 2011- Lucerne

Today was our last full day in Lucerne and as Man from Mars says “we’ve done a full round trip!” (he meant “we’ve come full circle” but he tends to customise his clichés). The coming full circle he was referring to was the fact that it’s very close to the end of our trip and the weather has become dreadfully cold and rainy—just like it was near the start of our trip in London. Today temps reached 12 degrees, with the wind and rain adding that extra chill factor that made us both whimper. Today I had to pile on a jumper, jacket and bought another cardie to layer on under my jacket because I couldn’t handle the cold. Tomorrow, after we leave Europe, we’ll be in Korea where the temps are sitting in the mid 30’s. My body will be so very confused.

Anyway, today was a pretty relaxed day. We started off with a cruise around Lake Lucerne. Unfortunately, because of the fog and low hanging clouds, we didn’t get to see the snow capped mountains that everyone comes to Lucerne to see. However, the green mountain face and cute colourful houses made for a delightful boat ride nonetheless. We braved the front deck (and the wind, rain and chill) for the first half hour to take some pictures (below) before retreating indoors and telling the old Italian couple seated next to us “Brrrrrr!!!” (a universally understood sound effect) to which they rubbed their hands together (a universally understood action) and we laughed together.

[Our ship:]

[The green-ness of it all:]

[The mountain-ness of it all:]

[The freezing coldness of it all:]

Afterwards, we had a typically Deutsch lunch of Currywurst, bread and baked potatoes, before setting off for some typically Swiss shopping- think chocolate and knives. Man from Mars and I each made some critical Victorinox purchases (do you know how many different types of pocket knives they have in the Lucerne branch for Victorinox?) before indulging in the cocoa aromas at Bachmann.

As the rain was pouring down for the much of the day, we opted for an early dinner of vegetable pasta and pizza before returning to our room to repack our bags. Man from Mars is such an organiser, and our bags have been categorised accordingly:

- Fragiles

- Stuff we need in Korea

- Everything else

It’s worked out quite well and he reckons we’ll *just* make the weight limit. Our flight is at 9:30 pm tomorrow and we land in Korea at 3:30 pm. It’s gonna be a looooonnnng day.

18 September 2011- Zurich/Lucerne

This morning we were all so tired from our 2 am effort. We woke up, said a half hearted “good morning” to each other before spending the next half hour yawning, staring off into space and declaring our love for sleep. Miss Poised Procurer’s boyfriend came over and with the rain striding down, we waited at the bus stop to get catch our ride for brunch. It turns out we could have easily walked- it was literally 200 metres away from the bus stop. But with rain, comes wind and with wind comes extreme displays of shelter seeking. Thus, the bus reigned supreme and we sheepishly hopped off within 30 seconds.

Breakfast was phenomenal. Given that it was 12:15 pm before we had finally gotten our acts together to get dressed, go all 200m to the café, snag a table in this tiny eatery and sort out our orders, the massive portions were a godsend. We ate, took some photos and then went home. In a twist of great timing, our bus was already to roll when we came out from the café and so, we again rode all 200m back home on the bus.

[Best breakfast evs:]

Man from Mars and I packed our bags while Miss Poised Procurer packed her bags for a work trip and Miss Cheese&Bread flopped on the sofa and kept us entertained with her random musings and potential man friend thoughts.

[Saying bye to Miss Poised Procurer at Zurich HP:]

[Decadent fine Swiss chocolates from Miss Poised Procurer- our kind host. So amazing!]

When our luggage had been repacked, we took the 45 minute train ride to Lucerne from Zurich Haupt Bahnhof. We then dumped our bags before walking out for an evening of exploring. The sun was setting as we searched for a (mildly affordable) place to have dinner and the lake and its surroundings were stunning. Lucerne is so beautiful- against the backdrop of fog and mountains, there are big town squares, painted buildings and quiet, unassuming people who are lovely.

[Out and about in Lucerne- elegant swans in formation- Man from Mars' awesome photo:]

[Lake Lucerne:]

[Alfresco painted buildings in the middle of Lucerne:]

[Lucerne by dusk:]

[The Old Bridge- part of it was destroyed by fire and it was then rebuilt:]

[View from the Old Bridge:]

[Man from Mars on the Old Bridge:]

Another difference we’ve experienced from Italy to Switzerland is the weather. The temperature has bottomed out at 13 degrees (a full 19 degrees lower than the sweltering highs we felt in Rome) and it was even colder tonight when we motored home after a hearty Italian pasta.

We are in our last stop in Europe before we head to Korea in the next two days – what an epic trip it’s been so far. I’m craving some Vegemite and hanging out for some home cooked food, but on the other hand, I’m half dreading the return to work, stress and all that stuff. This holiday has been so enriching, at times difficult, hot, sweaty, cultural, Italian, French, Swiss German, Korean and English. Everything. I’m going to savour our last full day in Europe tomorrow- hopefully, we’ll take a cruise around Lake Lucerne. Tschuss until then!

17 September 2011- Zurich

Is it just me or does Zurich bear a tiny resemblance to Melbourne? It has a main shopping street that looks like Bourke Street, there are buses that like trams that run like clockwork, a lake (kind of like the Yarra, work with me here) and changeable weather.

Man from Mars and I shopped and purchased quite a lot—a fact that left both Miss Poised Procurer and Miss Cheese&Bread perplexed given that Switzerland is really expensive, there isn’t as much choice as Italy and London, and everyone really only “browses” in Zurich—leaving the purchasing to the other European cities. Man from Mars scored at H&M buying two jumpers—one green (his nemesis-- he thinks green means spew colour, but I’m bringing around and pointing out the difference between bottle green, fluoro green and puke green) and one red. Meanwhile, I was motivated to buy some German fiction in a hopeful effort to remember and maybe regain the German I knew in high school.

[They park really close to the kerb in Zurich:]

[Zurich:]

We returned home in the late afternoon to find Miss Poised Procurer and Miss Cheese&Bread completely wiped after partaking in a 10km run (a formal one, kind of like the City to Surf). They finished it in just over an hour, and soldiered on to take Man from Man from Mars and me out to meet their friends and enjoy some Italian. The night was going swimmingly- we had eaten our pastas, focaccias, pizzas and had some lovely conversations with their seriously good-looking and genuinely nice group of friends. However, as we were reaching for our wallets to split the bill, we discovered that someone had pinched the handbag of one of the group. It had been sitting on the floor—and with her seated at the end of the long table talking to everyone else, nobody had noticed anyone reach under the table to take her giant tote that was filled with everything important- her purse, phone, house keys. We were stunned. This is Switzerland we’re talking about- the country of diplomacy, safety, rules (eg. Sunday is rest day and you’re not allowed to do anything remotely taxing like laundry) and precision. Usually, the thieves are looking for cash, so they’ll often take the money and dump the bag in the alleyway. We looked around the backstreets, but we didn’t find her bag anywhere, so we walked together to find a police station. Strangely, despite the police station being fully manned, they refused to take down a report of her incident, saying that we’d “missed” the relevant window to make the report. She would have to return at 7 am the next morning.

We took the train home, confused by the police swarming the streets (this was highly unusual for Switzerland, so we were told), and then parched and delirious from fatigue, we drank tea and flopped down in front of the tv to watch Schlag den Raab. It’s a highly addictive and hugely exciting German game show where a contestant (the challenger) duals with another guy (the show’s resident smart and strong guy who dresses in potato sack coloured clothing, sports a crew cut, knows his atlas from his key dates and hisses “Yassss!” (read “Yesssss” with a German accent) every time he wins). The contestant sweats each round out, in pursuit of a huge amount of cash (eg 1.5M euros in this episode).

The rounds alternate between challenges which test their intellect (history and trivia), reaction time (bouncing two balls and seeing who can catch them both with one hand), athleticism (driving around a haystacked race track), and cool under pressure (rolling a tyre from 20 metres away so that it sneaks precisely through the gap between two blocks). It is taped live, so the contestants can often run off the set for a toilet break because German television only has commercials every half an hour or so. Also, you never know how long it’s going to take--for this particular night, if we were exhausted when we got home at midnight, we were completely smashed when the show finally wound up (in hugely anticlimactic fashion) at 2 am. The resident strong/smart guy had been leading for the entire first half of the show, but the contestant came back to win in typical underdog style. After some confusion as to whether he had done enough to win, the audience clapped uncertainly before the host confirmed him as the victor. It was like the audience had exhausted their enthusiasm in what turned out to be a 6 hour game show, and so, the contestant leapt, his girlfriend cheered, happy in the knowledge of her financial security and we rolled off to bed without so much more as a second glance.

[Schlag den Raab and getting hyperactive:]

[Rolling the ball between a tiny gap:]

[End of the night: Man from Mars trying to fix the toilet seat that kept going lopsided:]

16 September 2011- Venice/Zurich

Tired as and can’t be bothered to recount. Essentially, our day went like this.

1. Wake up.

2. Get on a boat for 45 minutes to cross the Canal to get to the station.

3. Get on a train for 3 hours. Sit opposite another wealthy American couple. Avoid any conversation with them until the final five minutes where we both act suitably friendly and exchange travel itineraries and thoughts on Italy.

4. Get off train in Milan. Hang around for next train for 45 minutes. Get on next train to Zurich.

5. Sit on train for next 4 hours. Sit opposite young Chicago couple. Talk quite a lot to them. Girl is serious and hardly cracks a giggle. Guy is like a happy puppy, pumped for his first overseas trip. He keeps trying to take photos from the train window but times them wrong and they’re always obstructed by a tree, a house or a powerline. Train is 40 minutes late into Zurich. Greeted by Miss Poised Procurer and enjoy a hearty Greek banquet in the heart of Switzerland.

6. Thunder strikes and we run home in the rain. Drenched. The weather is 10 degrees colder in Switzerland than it is in Italy. A welcome change.

7. And, now is now.

[Beautiful scenery on the way to Zurich:]

[Drenched after dinner and Man from Mars stinks like a muggy creek:]

15 September 2011- Venice

Today we wandered around Venice, dodging the tourists and popping in and out of the hundreds of glass shops that are open in the narrow streets. Man from Mars bought a cool clock made from Venetian glass and I got some earrings. The highlight of Venice is the fact that streets are cut off by canal; that everywhere you look, the city is floating on a giant body of water. In addition, there’s the fact that you can literally “get lost” in Venice and not have to worry about actually getting too lost, since you’re on an island. The atmosphere in Venice is a mixture of Disneyland (almost everything is glitzy and geared towards the tourist experience) and old Italy (think grand three story palaces lining the canal). There isn’t too much to do there, which in a way is great- because it makes you wander, become confused with the many many alleyways, deadends and similar looking shops, and enjoy the city for what it is.

On the other hand, the downside of Venice is the ridiculously expensive food. It costs almost double what we paid in Florence, Siena and even Rome- I guess it’s to be expected because it is, above all, a tourist city. But still, so expensive!

We didn’t do too much else today- it’s been a good lazy two days.

[We walked through a door and came into a courtyard. It exits out onto the canal:]

[More gondolas:]

[Venice, the floating city:]

[Our last dinner in Italy:]

[St Mark's Square by night:]

Did you enjoy Man from Mars’ powerpoint slide yesterday? It’s his specialty at work—he’s renowned for his awesome powerpoint slides and I requested (read: forced) him to do yesterday’s blog entry because I was tired. He chose his own mode of presentation and did what he does best. A brief, easy to read recount of the day’s events.

[Man from Mars, working hard yesterday:]

Tomorrow we’re off to Zurich!!